Never trust a computer you can’t throw out a window.
To the optimist, the glass is half full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.
To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
To the plumber, any liquid in the glass is potential income.
-(With thanks to John Pettit and Ed O’Connell)
We’ve been working on the basics because, basically, we’ve been having trouble with the basics.
-Bob Ojeda, baseball pitcher
The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.
-Yogi Berra, baseball catcher and manager
Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points they almost always win.
-Doug Collins, basketball commentator
The only reason we’re 7-0 is because we’ve won all seven of our games.
We have only one person to blame, and that’s each other.
-Barry Beck, New York Ranger, on who started a brawl.
Diplomacy is about surviving until the next century. Politics is about surviving until Friday afternoon.
-Sir Humphrey Appleby
Hope you survived until Friday afternoon. Have a great weekend!